Tuesday, January 15, 2008

On the Lighter Side...

Gas Prices

When the family car developed a slight knock, the husband asked his wife if she had bought regular or premium gas, but she couldn't remember. "You probably got the cheaper gas," he said. "That could account for the engine running so rough." "No, the gas wasn't cheaper!" she replied indignantly. "Well, how much did it cost?" he asked. "It cost the same as always," she replied. "I bought the usual ten dollars worth."

Plans

"I want my children to have all the things I never could afford - then I want to move in with them."

Relatively Speaking

"What are you so happy about?" a woman asked the 98-year-old man. "I broke a mirror," he replied. "But that means 7 years of bad luck." "I know," he said, beaming. "Isn't it wonderful?"

Lost Phone

My girlfriend called me as she was driving to an appointment. She arrived, and I could tell from her voice that she was getting frustrated. Finally she said, "I know I had my cell phone with me. And now I can't find it!" I replied, "Aren't you talking on it!?" There was a lengthy period of stunned silence as the reality of the situation sank in - followed by, "You are NOT going to tell anybody about this!"

15 Exercises We'd Be Better Off Without In 2008...

~ Jumping on the bandwagon
~ Wading through paperwork
~ Running around in circles
~ Pushing your luck
~ Spinning your wheels
~ Adding fuel to the fire
~ Beating your head against the wall
~ Climbing the walls
~ Beating your own drum
~ Dragging your heels
~ Jumping to conclusions
~ Grasping at straws
~ Fishing for compliments
~ Throwing your weight around
~ Passing the buck

By Art Dunham

4 comments:

Nicholas Z. Cardot said...

My wife read the beginning of your cell phone joke and said, "THEIR GIRLFRIEND?"

It was funny!

Anyways, re-email me that address and leave a comment over at my blog when you do it so I will know what time period to look in my spam box. I have over 1000 spam in my spam box so I can't really just dig back through it and look for it. I appreciate it. We'll get that book to you one way or the other!

Anonymous said...

Good Stuff...

Lord Bless...

Teacherbug said...

lol...that was good! I enjoyed those.

Anna Joy said...

Funny! I had the same thought when I saw the cell phone joke! :)